Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Happy Anniversary Philip and Meredith

(Updated**)
Two years ago our friends Philip and Meredith were married, in a beautiful seaside ceremony.

So a little background. Philip and Meredith had been dating for eons, and finally decided to get hitched in 2006. Why is this blog significant to me? Our friends anniversary? I don't even know some of our families anniversaries off the top of my head, so why them?

Scott and I have known Philip and Meredith for a while. I would have called us casual friends. We'd kayak together, but our friendship was really based on like hobbies, Kayaking.

When I went to Japan for a month back in 2004, Philip and Meredith really took care of Scott. They had him over for dinner, (made sure he was eating, even made him meat, those vegetarians did) provided him with companionship. It was so nice of them to make sure he wasn't too lonely. I guess they remembered what it was like being apart from their significant other. After I returned, they continued to invite us over for barbecues, and we always intended to reciprocate. (The big thing stopping us back then was the lack of a dining room table.) But again, I'd still call us casual friends.

When I was admitted to the hospital, with pre-term labor, Meredith came to visit me almost every day. She worked on campus and would take time out of her day to make sure there wasn't anything I needed. She'd bring me little treats from her office to break up the horribly bland and disgusting hospital food. She'd brighten my day by breaking up the endless hours of beeping and blood pressure readings. I was shocked by her thoughtfulness. Not because she's not a thoughtful person, but because I didn't expect her to be the friend to step up. You know the people in your life that you EXPECT to step up, and then when you are in crisis, there are some that surprise you.

When I was sitting vigil bedside (for five months) Meredith came to visit me (and the boys) every week. She asked me to call her anytime to go to lunch. (I would have, but every time I thought of it, it was two or three in the afternoon, when all normal people had undoubtedly had their lunch.) She got me a parking pass to use in the employee lot for those days that I couldn't find parking in the patient lot. Knowing she was a phone call away made a difference, even if I never did call. Having her come visit every week was very special to me, it was a small connection to the outside world.

And then, one month into our NICU stay, Philip and Meredith's wedding day arrived. There was never any pressure to attend. Let me say that again, never any pressure, total understanding that we might be there, or we might not be there. But barring a crisis, we were planning on being there. Their wedding marked the first "social" event Scott and I would attend after the birth of the boys. The first time we didn't sit bedside all day Saturday and Sunday. The first time we would venture away from the boys for more than a quick bite to eat, or to get some sleep (or to go to work). The first (and one of the only times) time we actively chose not to be bedside. We were both glad we went. We got some fresh air, saw the sun, saw some friends, and saw our friends be married.

Their anniversary is special to us because for the first time in a month, we pulled ourselves out of the darkness and into the light. Their anniversary is special to us because when we needed it most, this pair pleasantly surprised and shocked us by stepping up so far beyond expectations.

It's true, when life throws you for a loop, you'll find people you never expected, move to the front and get you through it.

Thanks guys, you'll never know how much your friendship has meant to us.

(And I hope on your anniversary, you are not asleep on the couch.)

__________
**I can't believe I forgot to add this!!!
When our house was threatened by wildfires, it was Philip and Meredith that called and called until we relented and stayed in their home for days. We sat together watching reports, trying to figure out just how close the fire was to our home. They provided a safe shelter, friendship, support, and a playmate for our boys during a very nerve wrecking time.

By the way, I wouldn't describe them as "casual friends" anymore.

4 comments:

@KayakPhilip said...

Thanks guys, I'm completely suprised that you remembered. I couldn't even tell you when my parents anniversary is.

Passed out on the couch? Suprisingly, no. Perhaps at our 2nd its not so easy to forget :-). Some nice wine, nice food, and a toddler who went to bed on time without a murmur. Bliss!

Philip

Anonymous said...

Thanks Janice. That's so sweet of you.

For us our anniversary represents the beginning of our little family since Tobin was already with us that day and already making us very happy (and me sick).

It's been great to share the ups and downs of parenthood with you.

@KayakPhilip said...

I can scarcely remember 2 years ago, so much has passed and changed since then, and having a baby DOES turn you into a dimblebrain I swear.

It was easy for us to be relaxed if you came or not, its not like we saved you a seat 'cause we didn't have any :-) But we were honoured that you were able to spend some of your precious time then at our wedding, time away from the NICU and the boys.

Woman with a Hatchet said...

That was a very sweet memorial, Janice!

Mainly I dropped by to say I was sorry if I made you sad, over in my place. Being a pet owner is wonderful and impossible, since they are all so short-lived.

Unless you own a tortoise. If only they were furry....

Take care!

Hatchet