Monday, January 21, 2008

Great Expectations

I think every parent has great plans for their children. But really most parents should just want their kids to grow up to be kind, gentle and loving. The Doctors and Lawyers in the family, well that's just gravy! If you have kind and loving children, really what else do you need? Okay, I'll also buy adding in there that they should have a career that allows them to move out of your house and have a home, of some kind, of their own. What else do you need?

As a parent of a preemie you adjust those expectations. When we were pregnant we would talk about how great the boys would be, athletic, happy, brilliant, etc. When they were born at 26 weeks and given a minute chance of living, those expectations fell away, and we hoped that they would first live, and then, we desperately hoped (and still hope) they would live a normal life. When other Mom's on the playground are comparing how early their child crawled, walked, talked, I'm just so thankful that my boys ever crawled, walked, and are now starting to talk. I hold my breath at every developmental milestone, not so my boys can be the best and the brightest, but so they can be normal.

Evan has started calling Ryan "Ya-Ya" I'm pretty sure it is to Ryan, although it may be a term of affection as he seems to call me "Ya-Ya" sometimes too. Today Ryan went down the slide, for the 1000th time, and Evan squealed "yeaaaaah, Ya-Ya" with his hands held triumphantly over his head.

Evan fell and hit his face on a Lego, he was crying and I was kissing him and holding him asking him where it hurt. Standing in front of us was Ryan, signing "Hurt". He then threw himself on top of Evan and gave him a huge hug. I said to him, "Oh, Ryan that was so nice of you, you are so sweet." and he then launched himself into my arms to give me a hug too.

They are so supportive of each other, and so caring and compassionate. They really seem to worry about the other. If Evan is crying, Ryan is right there to make sure everything is okay, and if it's not, he'll start to cry too, as if it will help ease his brothers pain. Evan is always so excited to see Ryan, even if they've only been apart for a nap. Evan lets out a squeal of delight as soon as he sees his "Ya-Ya".

I think we are on our way to meet those Great Expectations.

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